It's been a long time. I know I haven't been here but I hope you'll forgive me for that.
Today.
Today, is the first day of February. And we all know what that means. In just 14 short days, that's two weeks, the world will be giving their girlfriends roses and those nasty tasting candy hearts that are impossible to chew with cute little phrases on them.
It's the month of love, and everyone is looking for it. This year, for the first time in my life, I am NOT. I've never been the type of person who chooses to be single. I've never been the person to want to vomit at the romance. And the reason being is that I'm 14. There is no romance. No one loves anybody, they just think they do. Its a cultural disease, and you know its gotten you before. Bit you in the ass too. But its okay, because one day, you and everyone around you will grow up, and that's what I've been hoping for.
Teenage girls want to be in love. Teenage boys want to loose their virginity. So obviously, that's the worst combination in the world. I, do not want to be in love. I've resolved to act like a 5 year old. Love is gross. And having sex is stupid. I've realized in the last few months how easy it is to (NOT) fall in love.
That doesn't mean I don't want a boyfriend or I don't like Valentine's Day. It's a great holiday. Very Fun. I just want to be a kid. Kids don't fall in love. Kids have fun.
I'm sorry baby, for making you believe.
And maybe you could tell that I've done this before.
But I how can we be sure of such an awful thing as love?
-a forgotten song of mine
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